W-h-o’s W-h-o in Jersey and Winchester 2 Bishops Dakin and Willmott

Bishop Tim Dakin: 

The man who has a lawyer as a chaplain, just in case, and so that abuse victims that the Bishop harasses can be dispatched without problem and the Bishop faces no consequnces.
Yes, Gavin Foster is a trained barrister. So basically anyone vulnerable harmed by the Bishop and Diocese have no redress.

Bishop Tim Dakin was announced by Downing Street on a stormy morning a few years ago, and by shocking coincidence, I was sheltering in the conservatory of people who knew him. I was not a happy person to hear about the Diocese at the time, seeing as I was homeless thanks to them.

In March last year, the Bishop had me illegally traced by the same police who destroyed me, and left me shocked and in collapse, this is typical of the Diocese of Winchester, they have no knowledge or understanding of the harm they do. At least I hope it is naivety that has allowed their continued damage and not simply stone cold cruelty.

Anyway, after having me illegally traced through the same police who harmed me terribly and refused my complaint against them, the diocese of Winchester had nothing to say to me, after taking away my new identity that had allowed me some escape from the terrible inaccurate and one-sided records they had given me, the diocese and police had nothing to say.

I discovered the Dean’s suspension by chance as I was getting a lot of emails from Jersey and other places. I did not want to read emails and be dragged back into the past.
I was contacted by MACSAS, the useless abuse charity who had let me down and violated me alongside the Diocese, and they claimed that ‘the Bishop wanted to help me and put things right’ which was untrue, and I asked MACSAS if they knew what brown-nosing meant.

MACSAS never at any point had my permission to be involved with the diocese or as they were in London with my family and the local authorities, ensuring that the diocese could access me to defame me further in the Korris report.
Funny how so far, no one has respected my human rights and the legal side of privacy even though I am competent.

Anyway, I found out about the Korris rubbish (report) and it nearly killed me because it was a graphic and harmful misrepresentation of the Jersey situation, published online and circulated so that complete strangers were villifying me, meanwhile, in Jersey, a full scale campaign kicked off with me being villified, publicly wrongly accused in the press and media and the Dean being upheld by his political colleagues in the the States of Jersey where he sits.
This utterly crushed me.

After a few weeks, the Bishop still had nothing to say, and his ‘barrister-in-charge’ waffled aimlessly and claimed I wasn’t being harmed by the smear campaign.
I could hear Jane Fisher in his words, she is the one who states untruths as facts.

The matter raged on, and for months, out on the streets, I lay curled up in misery, with every slur against me raging through my head and no defence, I tried and tried to write my story but Jersey was blanked through trauma, and Bob Hill, now acting as my mediator, only brought bad news every day until I was too traumatized to speak to him, he also did not get my side of things but relied on Korris, which hurt me all the more.

http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/

I phoned Wolvsley to beg them not to keep this up, to refrain from the repeat violations of my life that occured in Winchester.
The Bishop of Winchester then decided he would speak, threatening me with court orders that I knew nothing about.
Showing clearly that justice and righting wrongs could not possibly be the aim of the matter.
You don’t launch such an investigation while stating that unjust and one-sided action that the victim does not understand is acceptable.
I told him so, but realised that Jane Fisher would be the one telling him what to say.

The horrendous charade proceeded, with a conflicted judge ‘volunteering’ to step in, Dame Heather Steel, and thus the Deanery rejoiced, my side was never to be taken, recorded or known, basically I was defamed and destroyed for 14 months for no reason, and the Bishop has never been able to communicate with or through my mediator effectively or take any notice of the harm he has been doing, or include me in the investigation.
Bob’s blog has in-depth coverage of the mess that Bishop Dakin has made and the damage it has done.
I have repeatedly asked a number of people connected to the matter, and the police, to bring an end to it and to prevent further harm, defamation and damage to me. As yet, I have been ignored, treated as mad by the police as I was in Winchester.
Obviously they consider ‘mad’ people, deserving of harassment and abuse.

Bishop Trevor Willmott:

A conflicted Bishop, the former Bishop of Basingstoke. Now Bishop of Dover.

A close friend of JM who was deeply involved in this matter, his feelings for her and belief of her side of things would mean that he could not be neutral. 
JM used to say he fancied her and recounted him hurrying after her to say goodnight in the car park after a meeting.

His other conflict was that he was more than willing to join in cult games in the Jersey churches, saying what he was told to, for example ‘I sense that there are people here tonight who are feeling fear, would they like to come up and be prayed for?’ etc.
Manipulation which was prevelant in the unhealthy side of Jersey churches, American-influenced cult-church stuff, that is and was damaging.


When the Channel Islands split from the Diocese of Winchester, Bishop Trevor took over overseeing the Channel Islands, no doubt with lots of sympathy for them and none for me.
And so the charade continued.

Polo describes Bishop Trevor as Bob Key’s new Mammy.

Interestingly enough, off topic, some people in Jersey do say that the Dean is a female, ie, the wife is the Dean, and things the Dean said in church certainly backs that up.
Thats a bit sharp, but while I thought of it, I wrote it.

http://freespeechoffshore.nl/stuartsyvretblog/2009/07/

Statement about the Archbishop’s interview

I am writing in response to the Archbishop’s statement on BBC Jersey.

I have to say, and it is the opinion of others too. That the Archbishop didn’t seem to have a point to his interview, and thus I wonder why he agreed to an interview.

The closest that myself and others could come to a point in his interview was that he appeared to be trying to say everyone in the matter is just fine.

How very confusing. I would disagree with him.

He praises and upholds Bishop Dakin, who launched the public attack on the Jersey Deanery with the Korris report, an inaccurate and inadequate report into the matters that occurred around the churchwarden abusing me, and he thus caused the reaction of anger and rebellion in the Jersey Deanery, which was completely avoidable and at the same time caused me severe harm on top of the damage already done.

If I was Archbishop Welby, I wouldn’t be saying that Tim Dakin was great and did well.

Because all that Bishop Dakin has achieved is injury, division and needless harm, thus I have to disagree with Archbishop Welby, who appears to only be taking part in an interview to placate all, and wandering from the reality of the matter, of which he seems to have minimal understanding.

The Archbishop states his faith in the Dean of Jersey, but equally claims to stand by his apology to me.

My mind boggles as I try to comprehend this.

So, he he believes in the Dean? And he still apologizes to me for the handling of my complaint?

I can’t really comprehend this. I wonder if anyone else can unravel what he means by this?

Bearing in mind that he was speaking on BBC Jersey and obviously doesn’t want to rock the boat again, and also that he hasn’t actually personally apologized to me or even read my correspondence, he simply issued a vague apology in the press at the same time as that inaccurate Korris report, that damaged me horribly, was issued; Neither the Bishop nor the Archbishop have at any point arranged to meet me and apologize in person or get my side of the Story. And thus, all reports since are unbalanced.

Despite correspondence sent to him, the Archbishop seems completely unaware of my story and of the fact that I have been and am suffering very badly as a result of this ongoing matter, which is affecting my life and health profoundly and leaving me in constant fear of further damage.

The Archbishop claims that he ‘has to make sure I am receiving pastoral care’ Is he really not aware after all the harm done to me by this badly handled issue and the record that I have as a result of the Church of England, that ‘pastoral care’ from the Church of England is not welcome, and that I only feel violated by the interventions by the Church of England, which so far in the past year has only been offered in the form of an illegal referral to the NSPCC by Diocesan Safeguarding officer Jane Fisher, who has severely damaged me and who did not have my permission to refer me to anywhere, especially not as I had a formal complaint against her at the time, which continues to be blankly ignored by the Church of England.

My pastoral care is in my own hands, and the repeated forced interventions by the Church of England are a violation akin to rape, and my response to these forced violations is the anger for which they have previously had me detained and brutalized by the police.

The referral to the NSPCC was ridiculous, firstly due to the fact that I am no longer a child and do not have care of a child, as well as the fact that the referral was made without my consent and the Diocese knew my feelings about Jane Fisher from my re-iterated complaint against her last year, and the fact was that not only was the referral done without my consent, it was attempted by the Bishop to force this ‘help’ on me, and this caused massive distress, this was at the point where I wrote my legal letter to the Bishop -which can easily be found on my blog.

Those who don’t know, the Bishop made veiled threat of further action against me when I cried to him in distress and horror when he had me forcibly traced and violated by police in March 2013, when the very reason I responded was because HE HAD HAD ME TRACED, WRONGLY AND SHOCKINGLY THROUGH THE POLICE, only to ignore my questions why and my distress, and I was afraid of a repeat of the continued violations of my private life and illegal interventions and referrals and violations by Jane Fisher and Bishop Scott-Joynt in Jersey and Winchester in 2008-2011 that led to them repeatedly having me brutalized by police and locked up for my response. Jane Fisher and Bishop Scott-Joynt treated my rights and privacy as a joke and prevented me from ever getting help or being able to trust, they destroyed my friendships, social life, career, community work, hope and future, and that remains the case.

The attempts by the Church to force help on me alongside making a massive public disaster about the historic abuse complaint and then attempting to put it all right in an even more damaging way, is not remotely Christian, and Tim Dakin’s dreadful ‘lost last and least statement’ where he claimed that his staff had ‘been working hard’ to get me help, when the reality was that they had tried to force me to be in contact with a colleague of Jane Fisher’s from the NSPCC is dire and very unchristian.

So I am not sure why the Archbishop is praising Bishop Dakin, especially as he has damaged lives, especially mine, for no reason, wasted hundreds of thousands of pounds, and continues to leave me in fear that my newly rebuilt life will be destroyed again by this matter.

The reality is that this matter has been handled terribly on all sides and maximum harm has been done to me as a result, whereas in my life, I had made my confession to God for my sins of anger and distress as my Post-Traumatic-Stress went out of control in Jersey and was made increasingly worse by Jane Fisher’s actions, I had left this matter in the past, and the way it has been publicly dragged up and I have been publicly flogged for it is horrific, the Church of England demonstrating that in 2000 years they have not changed from the crowd that called for Jesus’ public flogging and crucifiction as they are doing the same to me.

I gather that either the Archbishop was ill-prepared for his interview on BBC Jersey and had little understanding of the matter, or he was badly briefed. He certainly demonstrated that despite me writing to him, he has not read my letter and has no understanding of my circumstances. But it is absolutely baffling how he can be on BBC Jersey praising people who have made such a mess, the gulf between the reality of the situation and the Archbishop’s words are horrendous as I live each day expecting the CofE’s unbalanced reports and damage limitation press releases to harm me further.

HG

Personal message to the Archbishop of Canterbury:

What I would ask of the Archbishop, if he cares in the slightest and is not just speaking empty words from a brief put together by others, is:

Firstly, please read my side of things, and do not violate my life and privacy further by dragging this matter up in the media, you make me ill when you do this, please do not publicly praise people who have done wrong, it makes me ill, please do not insinuate that my pastoral care is remotely to do with your Church who have destroyed me and left me destroyed, especially as you and your church ignore my correspondence and have not dealt with Jane Fisher’s wrongdoing and continued violation of my rights and privacy by her continued illegal interventions which started in Jersey and continued even until last year.

Please stop this childish charade and close the matter down with no further harm to my life and reputation, you are making my life and relationships very hard and disrupting my therapy, you have done throughout this matter and appear to have complete disregard for my life and feelings as a human being.

And please remember, you have not yet produced a report or carried out an investigation which represents my full story accurately, and yet you have allowed investigations which interview supporters of the Dean who have never met me.

Please do not underestimate the toll that this is taking on my physical health, if this matter kills me, you will not be able to credibly talk about pastoral care and my welfare, nor will your ‘apology’ be of any worth, be aware that I have asthma and high blood pressure and heart problems that have been frequently triggered by this terrible matter and it does put me at risk from death.

If you consider yourself a Christian, then be aware that what you and your Church are doing in being less than honest about what is and has gone on and if you continue to harm me with forced ‘help’ or media releases, you cannot continue to call yourselves Christians any longer. Remember Jesus’ reaction to the people about to stone a woman for adultery? The way I have been publicly flogged and branded by the Church of England is as bad as that attempted stoning, and Jesus sin’t standing there condoning what you are doing to me, so when is this matter to be concluded and the public flogging of me to stop? Do you or any of you think you will stand before God after this dreadful mess and the cover-ups and ‘smoothing down’ of this dreadful mess?

What is so terrible about me, for sins past and repented that is worse than what my abusers and their supporters have done, that they are not publicly flogged and I am?

HG

Other People’s Perspectives 3 – VoiceforChildren

Other People’s Perspectives, VoiceforChildren’s blogs on the Jersey matter.

Starting from the first they are;

No.1 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/03/bob-key-and-jersey-way.html

No.2 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/03/the-jersey-establishment-closes-ranks.html

No.3 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/03/bob-key-support-and-recognised-formula.html

No.4 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/03/senator-philip-bailhache-letter-to.html

No.5 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/04/open-letter-to-bishop-of-winchester-tim.html

No.6 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/04/dean-reinstated-press-release-from.html

No.7 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/05/business-as-usualthe-jersey-way.html

No.8 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/05/philip-bailhache-independenceagenda.html

No.9 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/06/senator-philip-bailhache-grouville.html

No.10 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/10/3rd-anniversary-of-abuse-victims.html

No.11 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/11/jersey-dean-who-exonerated-him.html

No.12 http://voiceforchildren.blogspot.com/2013/12/exonerated.html

 

 

Polo’s new blog on the Dean

http://photopol.blogspot.ie/2014/03/proxy-bishop-bob.html

Post 1 -Other people’s perspectives

I am going to start comiling lists of links to other bloggers posts about my case. Starting with Bob Hill’s blogs.
Bob bases his posts on the Korris report a lot, which can make them inaccurate and traumatic at times, but he also has a lot of paperwork and in depth knowledge of States and Police processes.
 I think that as he has kept these posts about me up, he wont mind me linking and thus increasing traffic to his balanced and insightful blog. Especially as he does things without asking. 🙂
Remember, these blogs are not my opinion nor necessarily my true story, but they do help with background, but they were written by a good and honest man who was doing his best.

Bob Hill 2013/14:

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/03/the-dean-bishop-and-good-shepherds-fact.html

http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/the-dean-and-voice-in-wilderness.html

http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/jerseys-dean-and-victims-tale.html

http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/jerseys-dean-victory-or-climb-down.html

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/05/jerseys-dean-did-punishment-fit-crime.html

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/05/jerseys-dean-diocese-of-winchester.html

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/05/jerseys-dean-red-letter-day.html

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/06/jerseys-dean-meaningless-apologies.html

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/07/jerseys-dean-doubting-thomases.html

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/07/jerseys-dean-another-meaningless-apology.html

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/08/jerseys-dean-and-silly-season.html

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/08/jerseys-dean-laitys-jep-advert.html

 http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/10/jerseys-dean-dame-heather-saint-or.html

  http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2013/10/jerseys-dean-dame-heather-saint-or.html

Written for the man at Autism Jersey on 03/09/2008 -showing JM’s involvement

 This is an extract of an email written top the man at Autism Jersey, I was under too much stress at the time and was waiting for the police to contact me to take my statements, they were bogged down with historic abuse investigations into Haute de la Garrenne at the time, and I was due to spand a weekend with JM, at her invitation as always.

She didn’t like me being away in Jersey and was always talking about getting me to come home, although her support of me when I was in Hampshire was very hit and miss and her husband’s behavior was always there in the background.

One of my thoughts about everything I have been through is, what happens to the vulnerable who cannot write, as I do? what happens to them?
As with all posts, I have omitted names where necessary, I think Philip is known as Philip and was not a wrongdoer here, he can object directly and I will remove his name, but as he was a genuine and non-abusive man, I have left his name on here.

Writing for Philip:

JM emailed me in reply to an email, she talked about me maybe ‘making a strategic withdrawal from Jersey’, I know that she has been a bit biased about me being in Jersey before, maybe she wants me home and under her watchful eye, but I am worried that she has spoken to the Churchwarden couple or that the Dean has suggested that I am dragged back to Hampshire and not allowed home again, I have not gone ahead with arranging to go back to her this weekend yet, as I am too worried about being trapped, and what damage is done to my friendship with JM by the Dean and the Churchwarden couple, whatever happens, I need to be working wherever I am, but I want to be in Jersey, I don’t want it taken away from me, I have been offered the cleaning job from the church people, it is one morning a week.

I am worried that JM has said the wrong things to the dean, she wanted to make it look like Churchwarden was naive, because she thought questions might be asked about why I stayed on with the family despite what was happening, but I stayed on because Churchwarden called me daughter, and I wanted to be daughter.

JM is away all day today so I am worried sick and haven’t booked the ticket to go to JM for the weekend. I don’t think I can go back to Hampshire for a break yet, but I must find work.

The pressure in my head is tremendous

I think the Churchwarden couple may have contacted JM again, and hence they go on damaging me.

I think that if JM, who sometimes doesn’t understand things, has told the Dean that I am ‘seductive’ because I was abused or anything, My ex-therapist in England, LD, may be able to explain my Character and behaviour much better than JM, please pass that offer on to the Dean, I feel that the Dean is against me, so anything that JM mistranslates will be used against me.

Do enquire to the police.

This was written for the Dean in 2008, when he was disbelieving of me and the man at Autism Jersey thought it would be a good idea for me to introduce myself properly, it was titled ‘who am I to make a complaint’ I have removed the photographs that went with the original document

This letter below reads like me defending myself on trial, and basically it is, the Dean saw me and rubbished my complaint and was obstructive, at the time I still had a full life, with friends and activities, although the stress was starting to cause me and my life to collapse.

Later, in the years after this was written, it ceased to be true, because I was maligned to all churches and to my friends, and JM and Jane Fisher liased to malign me to my old benefice so that my church friends were all gone. 

I was left with nothing, and nothing was done about the Churchwarden of JM’s husband, who remained protected and supported by the church, again, I see this as branding me worse than a sex offender. 

I have removed the photographs of me sailing and with friends from this letter, for obvious reasons.

Who am I to make a complaint?

I am a 27 year old girl with asbergers syndrome which is mild autism and a few other problems, when I am not being driven mad I can come across as normal/mildly eccentric.

My background was a bit unsettled because of problems my family faced and the fact that we had to move a lot, I left home at 17 and went to college, I achieved a number of qualifications despite my problems, and have had a career working in gardens and on farms, I came to the church through my friend (JM) when I was 17/18.

I don’t tell people about myself, I am a private soul.

I am a quiet person, I am afraid of people that I don’t know, this may be because of autism, my background or the fact that people ask questions and I grew up not being able to answer questions, and still struggle to explain my background and circumstances anyway. I have been diagnosed with social phobia as a result. But despite this I still go out and join in things, and if people make an effort they do get through to me and I can build friendships.

I am an angry person, I get things wrong, I try to be nice, I try to be moral, I don’t always get that right but I don’t smoke, drink alcohol, sleep with people or do drugs and I don’t think people are there to be used.

Because I am Asbergery I get into habits that I cant break easily, which is why was hard for me to break the cycle of going to St. A’s church.

I don’t like change, I don’t like some sounds and lights, I am not very keen on physical contact, some forms of physical touch send me haywire, but on the other hand, with good friends, there is nothing I love more than a good cuddle.

I like wildlife, I am absolutely fascinated by toads, ducks  and hedgehogs, I don’t know how they work without motors, but they are good to talk to.

I enjoy a variety of activities, photography, cycling, playing badminton, learning to surf and boogie boarding, I enjoy writing and drawing little pictures, I have a sense of humour, I really enjoy time with my church friends, for example going for meals,doing the bible society walk or helping out at Jersey Keswick, but my deepest love of all is sailing and the sea, secretly I love dinghy sailing slightly more than big boats, but I find bigger boat sailing easier, and dinghy sailing reminds me of (the churchwarden), I have various sailing qualifications and sailing is one thing that keeps me physically alive, though due to the recent events, I don’t have much energy for sailing. On the Sark to Jersey rowing race I was proud to crew on a guard boat, I enjoy occasional cruises to france or the other islands with my budget sailing club, and I have had the privilege of sailing on a tall ship.

Church and socially:

I am or was a believer, I struggled with Christianity because of my background and because I didn’t feel that I could call myself a Christian due to my fear and mistrust of people. But I have always been a believer and praying and helping others has always meant a lot to me.

Having been badly battered by St. Andrews, my faith remains low, but I belong to two wonderful churches,  and I also occasionally go to the Town Church, and (five other churches), joint services at St. *****, I have also been to the ********* Church where some of my friends go. There is only one church on this island that I have found difficult, the rest are incredibly good.

This was written before the villification of me in the churches really kicked in

I enjoy helping out with things, at St.A’s my offers to help were soundly rejected.

Disabled people are less there, you don’t offer to help unless you want to be jeered. I remember the churchwarden jeering the other diabled woman for her efforts to move tables and chairs.

 

But despite being a ‘problem’ according to St. A’s, I have in the past at previous churches done sidesmans duties and welcoming, bellringing, youth and childrens group helping, reading lessons and prayers, general help with setting up and running services and events, taking part in or narrating dramas during services (Jersey churches don’t seem to do dramas), running the projector, taking part in mission support work, doing sponsored events, doing coffee after the service, etc, so I wasn’t up to St. A’s standard, but other churches have tolerated me, and I am pleased that despite being ill, I have been able to help with things for (two churches, before I was maligned to them), such as stewarding and setting out chairs at Jersey Keswick, helping with the ********** Romania project, helping with ********** work, moving chairs and tables, thats all so far, but they include me and I can be helpful.

Friends: How I get friends I don’t know, I am too fearful of people, but here are some of the friends and nice people in my life:

In Jersey, I am getting to know people, the churches are full of lovely people who I am growing attached to and who offer support love and prayers, especially now, I belong to a housegroup where I like and get on well with everyone, I belong to a lovely badminton team, I also belong to a sailing club where I get on well with everyone and have made  friends, I keep in touch with people I worked with when I came over here and I also remain on friendly terms with my ex-landlord. So the churchwarden couple are in a minority.

I did get on well with the ex-landlord until his friends in St. A’s etc maligned me to him.

Here is a picture of some friends, (pictire removed) (names removed), who  live in Winchester and have been my friends for 10 years, I went to live with them aged 17, I spent two years with them, we had surprisingly minor problems considering how confused I was back then, and they remain dear to me. This picture is taken at the Wayside Cafe at St. Brelades Bay where we were having lunch. Their niece, , lives in St. Brelades and is an officer at the ***************church, where I know several people.

I think this may answer a few questions as to my motivations and do I treat everyone like I apparently treatedthe churchwarden couple,

******

I guess information like this means that the Jersey Deanery are nearing their triumph and I am about to be destroyed by the reports that omit my views

Ian’s blog http://therightofreply.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/200000-pissed-up-wall-in-church-debacle.html

An email to Jane Fisher

Email to Jane Fisher, posted on my blog:

Dear Jane Fisher,

I have had a very difficult day, with flashbacks to traumas associated with you.

As you may have noticed, this was posted on my blog recently, from a historic email that you sent to me:

I know the Dean does not disbelieve what you have said. Nor does he side with **** The Dean is in a difficult position in that he too has to work within the procedures that govern the church. The Dean hasn’t sided with ****  or against you. He has to make sure that he is neutral so he can make any decisions or recommend any action without being biased. If that has seemed to you to be taking ****’s side against you I am sorry – and that really isn’t the case.

I have to ask then, why exactly did the Diocese suspend and then clear the Dean? If you considered him to be neutral?

If you did not consider the Dean seeing the abuser first and later in conversations with you and Martyn, rubbishing my complaint to be biased, then why, in March last year, did you publicly launch on him and me and wreck my life again?

It remains a mystery.

As you may have realised, I currently live indoors, but am unlikely to be able to keep living indoors.

This is because:

• I have daily flashbacks to what you have done to harm me, and it makes life very hard 
• Because of the record that you got me, I cannot work, be a useful part of society or belong anywhere properly
• I am purposeless and without any hope of quality of life or usefulness in society, living on the streets gave me the purpose of survival and the joy of freedom and my companions on the road
• I am now isolated, directionless, suffering the full horror of what you have done to harm me, in poverty and barely able to keep myself fed and pay the rent
• There is simply nothing here, this is not Jersey, where I had work, education and community roles, and those things cannot be brought back after three years of homelessness, police brutality and a record that I will never learn to live with, and which will leave me vulnerable to police and medical misenterpretation for the rest of my life
• Last year, before you launched on me and wrecked my life, I was building towards being able to do some form of work, as I will not be allowed to remain on ESA forever, sadly, your onslaught, and I say yours because there is no doubt that this mess originates from you, has left me broken and useless, and facing the transfer to JSA and the hell of hunting for jobs and not getting any because what employer in their right mind would take someone disabled, just off the streets, severely disturbed and with the record you have given me? I am not fit for work, nor will I be able to subsist on JSA and keep a roof over my head. Had you and your diocese not launched on me, I think I would have been able to go self-employed, maybe as a cleaner or something, because my body is too damaged to return to my trade as a gardener. The other problem with JSA is that I would lose my benefits every week through sanctions as I cannot use a phone properly.

What you did to me in getting me a police record because you didn’t deal with my complaint, was not justice, because you didn’t also face trial for your wrongs and were dishonest about me to police, courts and others, and it was not punishment, I mean, what ‘safeguarding director’ would punish a destroyed abuse survivor for her reaction to the ‘safeguarding director’s refusal to deal with a complaint?

You ruined me, and you ruined me to cover your and the Bishop’s wrongs, you upheld Bob Key in his action against me and let him lie to a court of (sic) law, 

The extract of your email above is a part of the bigger reason I went mad, you constantly denied my complaint and protected the wrongdoers and villified me in the church, I knew what had happened to me, and you cannot tell someone with autism that what happened to them did not.

I remember, and it is all conveniently totally missed out of the Korris report, how you refused to engage with my complaint that the Dean had called me wicked and said I wasn’t abused, you, and Tracy who you liased with, and Lou scott-Joynt, tried to excuse it for being about me turning up at the Deanery, no excuse at all, and Bob Key lied to the police and court that I turned up swearing and shouting, when I did not, I went to the Deanery when Lou Scott-Joynt said ‘Oh, what has Bob done?’ as if he had done nothing wrong in the first place, just as your email above implies.

So many lies and misconducts from church employees, and not one has faced justice, while I have faced utter ruin. You are responsible for this and for taking responsibility for what you have done, so until you stop and reverse the harm to me and take responsibility for yourself, you should not be in the position that you are in.

The thing with all these investigations is, they are not real because they have protected you and not taken my evidence, I have much more than the email above, but no-one has asked to see them, because from the Korris report onwards it was not about me or any vulnerable person, it was about back-covering, self-glorification by the church, and constitutional issues in Jersey, otherwise a proper account of you provoking me would have been included, and you would have been suspended and investigated instead of allowing to influence the investigation and encourage Bishop Dakin to treat me like dirt.

You consistently denied and refused to acknowledge my complaints, you made me out to be paranoid.

But if Bob key was doing everything right and was neutral, why exactly did you publicly launch on him?

And, if the Jersey Deanery’s side of things, that Bob Key met the abuser first and then me because I was harassing the abuser, then why did you allow Bob key to continue to be involved if he had taken their case? Because that is a conflict of interests that not even you can justify.

You tried to get me to meet with Key again in that same email of which the extract above is from, why? in light of  you accusing him of not following procedure last year, why did you want me to meet with him then, by which time you knew that he wasn’t following correct procedure and had rubbished my complaint in communication with you and Martyn, and yet, just as you did and continued to do throughout my time in Jersey, you rubbished me.

And this has ended up with me on death row, no quality of life, in fear of you and the Diocese again and being forced on by you and the Diocese again, while being villified by the Jersey Deanery, basically no change from 2008-2011, except that you cannot dub me as mad any more, you are being watched by many people because of the almighty public mess, you have left me truly ruined and a lot weaker in mind and body than before, and I am pretty much on death row, nothing to live for and waiting for more unbalanced back-covering reports that will further ruin me.

And no doubt you can explain it all away, on earth, yes, but God will not forgive you when you say your lines, and when you get to heaven you will be the one one facing court with no voice, as God sentences you for taking me life, because you have. You are just lucky you will never be thrown to the ground by the police and dragged by the scruff of your neck, exposing you and choking you, God has no need for the senseless brutality that you have had inflicted on me.